October 30
Yeah but how much time rilly? Act like you’ve got all the time, like poor cautious Sir Kier clinging onto the greasy pole and praying it doesn’t rain? Or no time, like some kind of jittery hyper-accelerated 21st century Carpe Diem drenched in the horrors of FOMO and YOLO like twin evil deities mocking your puny mediated efforts to stay connected? Relax, jack, as JAZZ NIGHT AT THE BEE’S MOUTH drifts thru the temporal web of unimaginable stringy wave/particle dilemmas in its own unholy orbit, dragging all towards the wildly swinging door and rotating severed mannequin head thru the sheer gravitational pull exerted by those twin tears in the fabric of the space-time continuum which physicists and their equations have learnt to explain as Luke “Event Horizon” Rattenbury (gtr) and Loz “Spaghettification” Thomas (drms), ready as ever to lay down a subatomic shelf of hot licks and cool grooves…. g’wan, overcome your uncertainty principle and come and get entangled with our multiverse of good vibes, the Bee’s Team manifesting on this earthly material octave to make with the quality hooch, me doing something or other on bass, the various esteemed special guests swinging in from the contested night to blow their horns, Abdul rapping in the window like the voice of your conscience, the nameless creatures of the night shuffling past on loop, all good company welcome, all bad company not, all the good things, none of the bad things, the equivocation and lies and bad faith and violence.. not here there ain’t, here there’s all the time you need, so make some time for it, why wouldn’t you?
October 23
As a mediated citizen of Airstrip One it is of course incumbent on you to react to the current horrendous turn in world events as all the worst people in the world go slouching to Megiddo trailing death in their filthy wake… but how? Pick a side and then splatter your violent ill-informed partisan opinions all over X (formerly Shitter), wring hands ineffectually etc? Or get along to JAZZ NIGHT AT THE BEE’S MOUTH, a non-partisan 100% inclusive event where all are welcome so long as they are prepared to deposit their own personal bullsh*t outside the gate, let Abdul The Gesticulator take care of it for a while, and get down and get with it to the sounds of the musical two-state solution that is Luke “The Path Of God” Rattenbury (gtr) and Loz “The Word Of God” Thomas (drms) as they work together to lay out a bounteous cornucopia of hot licks and cools grooves for your delectation and edification.. I’ll be there doing whatevs on the bass, Big Steve Labib may drop by to enrich all those who behold the gleaming brassy majesty of his mighty baritone, any amount of other esteemed guests may adorn the proceedings as they give it up and do their thing… politicians will gasp and pout like compromised goldfish on your tethered lil screens as the try to excuse the inexcusable and jump on the bloodstained bandwagon, so switch em off and come dig the real, the wind on the hill, the sere breath of autumn upon the golden leaf, the flocking of the starlings at twilight, C-beams glittering in the dark near the Tannhauser gate. all these moments will be lost in time like tears in rain so make em count.
October 16
Off to hell in a handcart we go, as the best are all ineffectual handwringing and the worst are full of passionate intensity they’ve discovered on X (formerly Orifice Of Moloch) as Elon the superdweeb stirs the pot and then simpers ‘Who, me?”, while all the inbetweenies alternate between screwing their eyes shut in terror and staring fixedly in horror… be thankful for JAZZ NIGHT IN THE BEE’S MOUTH an un-blockaded, non-affiliated, irregilious, undifferentiated, un-chartered joint where the only loyalty you need is to hot licks and cool grooves and all are free to come as long as they dig the vibe and leave as soon as they don’t.. We’ll be there playing as the ship shudders n lurches against the ice, thanks to the unflagging devotion shown by those interdimensional rulers of the shadows Luke “Azathoth” Rattenbury (gtr) and Loz “The Hellish Tracks Of The Living Fungi From Yoggoth” Thomas (drms) to the eternal values of sweet hot swinging music, keeping them laying out the good stuff for your delectation on the regular, while the chill wind grabs your collar, the icy inhuman music of the stars ullulates over your head, the waves churn the shingle like the turbid ebb and flow of human misery… don’t get down, sport, get along to where the music flows like the quality liquor flows from the hands of the superascended beings of the Bee’s Team, where the air is full of vibe, where it’s all to play for, drop by and sit in… just click your heels three times and say “Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn”.
October 2
Truly wonders shall never cease in this age of miracles, fish and frogs rain from the sky, the rivers shall run red, the beasts of the earth shall speak in tongues, a wind will come so mighty as to lay low the mountains of the earth, and Liz “Crazy Eyes” Truss shall attempt a political comeback even as the smoking bin fire of her last attempt still blackens the sweet morning air.. Thank ur lucky-ish stars for JAZZ NIGHT AT THE BEE’S MOUTH as it ascends yet again into the material world, as Fortuna’s wheel spins yet again and the principles of Boetius and Hroswitha can prevail to bring symmetry and geometry back to our poor scattered disorientated wits, all the better to dig the abundant torrent of sweet hot sounds pouring forth from the A Team of Luke “Pity The Fool” Rattenbury (gtr) and Loz “Hannibal’s On The Jazz” Thomas (drms) as they get together to do their thing and raise some dust under whatever freethinking mavens happen to drop by with their horns to get up and have a go.. I’ll be there doing my utmost on the ol doghouse, Capn Jack and Abdul the Gesticulator and the Shoplifters Of The World and the guy who always pretends it’s his birthday and the rest of the crew will be in attendance, the Bees’ Team will, of course, manifest themselves on this octave for long enough to serve you libations of A1 grade quality hooch, why stay away? Don’t leave the streets to the triumphant gammons driving their stupid cars at 30mph though urban areas while the whole country slides into the shitter around them, don’t leave the cultural space to unrepentant morons like Laurence “I’m Sorry I Got Caught” Fox, ignore Rishi and Cruella as they puff their weazened little faces up and screw up their eyes and stick their tongues out as a policy statement, take a hike, have a pancake, make a stand, strike a light, do a little dance, get down tonite, it’s all to play for.